Negative Thoughts Lead to Negative Performance

Negative thoughts can zap your performance. We have all experienced negative self-talk about our abilities, self-worth, future success, etc. This negative self-talk almost uniformly has a negative effect on performance. When we are engaged in goal focused activities we need adequate levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine in order to reach our goals or desired outcomes. When we are in a positive space and feeling confident, we have a higher likelihood that our brains will have adequate levels of dopamine present. When we are in a negative space and not feeling confident, we tend to have less of this very important chemical present. For adults with ADHD this phenomenon can be even worse. The reason it can be so much worse, is that people with ADHD already have a diminished amount of dopamine, so any reduction makes things far worse.

So how to do we create the patterns of thinking that lead to optimal performance?

The first step is to increase awareness. Awareness is absolutely critical to creating any change in thinking. We often take our thoughts as they come, never naming them or trying to change them. When we are not fully aware of our thoughts and feelings, we are prone to fall victim to unchecked negative thinking.

The next step is to start replacing negative thoughts with more adaptive an positive thoughts. For example, “I’m going to fail.” could be replaced with “I’m going to succeed.” or “I’m prepared and will do my best.” This obviously takes practice and for the best results it helps to work with a therapist who uses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The changes that result from CBT can be profound and last a lifetime. This is especially true for adults with ADHD as they tend to have a long list of negative experiences that drive an ocean of negative thoughts. In the video series Learn to Thrive with Adult ADHD, there is an entire module on CBT that has been shown to be very effective for all people wanting to change their thoughts, not just those with adult ADHD.

This has been very rudimentary overview of how thoughts can help or hurt your performance. If you want to understand things more, I recommend contacting a trained therapist  in CBT. I utilize CBT methods with both my ADHD clients and those who just want to find optimal mental performance. After all, the Silicon Valley is performance pressure cooker, so any mental techniques to gain an edge are important.

Success and Focus for Entrepreneurs with ADHD

What makes an adult with ADHD like Richard Branson so successful? Why do some adults with ADHD struggle to succeed in their career? There are many factors to this complex question. However, there is one overriding principal that allows entrepreneurs with ADHD to find success, and it is called focus. Focus is a big word for adults battling ADHD. The good news is that focus can be greatly improved through treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), skills coaching, exercise, and medication management.

CBT specifically, is focused on treating ADHD by teaching skills that improve executive functioning, decrease anxiety, and help provide direction. For many entrepreneurs it can mean the difference between an office full of half finished projects and a handful of very successful ventures. The process and techniques work to activate the brain in a way that helps boost an individuals ability to focus and execute their innovative ideas. San Francisco and the Silicon Valley are full of incredible people doing amazing things. Unfortunately, there are many standing on sidelines struggling to break through due to their Adult ADHD. With the right help, most of these people can make the changes they need to treat their ADHD and find the success they deserve. If this article resonates with you, then reach out, find support, and take control of your Adult ADHD and your career.

 

3 Reasons Exercise Helps Treat Anxiety

Anxiety by itself is not a disorder, but too much anxiety often is. Here are 3 reasons exercise helps treat anxiety:

1. Exercise boosts anxiety fighting neurotransmitters. Exercise naturally raises levels of serotonin and norepinephrine. This boost happens immediately and lasts over time, making exercise the natural “anti-anxiety prescription.” Additionally, exercise increases GABA which calms the brain making it easier to take advantage of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or other thought changing techniques.

2. Exercise reduces anxiety based tension in the muscles. When we are stressed or anxious our muscles react by holding tension. Exercise reduces that tension in the same way that the popular drug class beta-blockers do.

3. Exercise treats anxiety by breaking the chains or fear. When people are anxious, they typically get stuck in a loop of worry, fear, and apprehension that breeds more and more anxiety. By breaking this cycle with exercise, the brain is freed up to learn new thought patterns that can be strengthened with practices like CBT.

Exercise does not need to be overly strenuous or complex to have these powerful benefits in treating anxiety. Put on  your sneakers, go for a walk, and break the cycle of anxiety.

Overview of CBT for Adult ADHD

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy approaches for the treatment of Adult ADHD are designed to help people overcome deficits in executive functioning. Executive functions are critical for effective time management, organization, and planning. CBT also improves stress management, emotional regulation, and impulse control.

CBT has been established as an effective treatment for adults with ADHD who suffer from co-existing anxiety and depressive disorders. A major national study showed that 51% of adults with ADHD suffer from anxiety and 32% suffer from depression. This means treatments that incorporate CBT for anxiety and depression may be helpful to many adults with ADHD, even though they are not designed specifically to address the symptoms and impairment associated with ADHD. However, the skills training associated with specific CBT programs for ADHD adults, tend to show the greatest results.

Treatments that address executive dysfunctions aid adults in developing more adaptive thought patterns about how to go about planning, organizing, and gain more effective skills. For example an adaptive technique that utilizes CBT is to break down long or unpleasant tasks into manageable parts, while utilizing positive visualization. Positive cognitions(thoughts) and positive behaviors tend to reinforce one another. In other words, as a person becomes better at managing time, they also come to have more positive beliefs and thoughts about themselves. This pattern acts like a generator of positive/adaptive thinking and effective skill development.

Adult ADHD Relationships

There is considerable information out there about adult ADHD relationships. Unfortunately, the bulk of this information focuses on the negative effects adult ADHD has on relationships. I think it is of equal importance to give some attention to how adult ADHD can actually prevent the person with ADHD from being empowered in their relationship. This lack of empowerment can limit one’s ability to change or even get out of a bad relationship.

I see this often with clients who “come out of the ADHD fog” as I have named it. When adults are too distracted, forgetful, or struggling to maintain work or school performance, they often don’t have the psychological resources to address their romantic relationships. Something that also makes this problem worse, is that most adults with ADHD have considerable shame and self-doubt, which leads them to believe that any relationship struggles they face, are their own fault. It is true that adult ADHD can wreak havoc on relationships. However, this does not give clemency to the non-ADHD partner, nor does it mean that issues unrelated to adult ADHD also plague some relationships.

It is an honor to accompany my clients on their journey towards change. We all deserve healthy, symbiotic, and supportive relationships. Those people challenged by adult ADHD need to know and believe that also, so they may advocate for themselves and shape their lives in a positive way. There are many people walking around San Francisco that I have worked with around adult ADHD relationships through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), skills training, and relationship work. To know that there are people who are out of the fog and living life to it’s fullest, and know that I touched their lives, gives me a great big smile inside.

Couples Counseling San Francisco

San Francisco and the surrounding areas (Silicon Valley, Berkeley, Menlo Park, Palo Alto etc.) are full of psychotherapists providing couples counseling. Unfortunately, there seems to be a large amount of therapists treating couples without adequate direction and focus on goals. It is very common for a couple to come to me with the same complaints about previous therapy. Often the husband or boyfriend feels “ganged up on” or the couple feels that they paid weekly to fight in-front of someone and were sent home without anything to try or practice.

I work diligently with couples of all combinations to quickly identify the reasons that have brought them to my office, their individual goals, and their shared goals. I believe it is paramount to have clear goals in couples therapy in order for it to be effective. Couples in San Francisco and the Silicon Valley are often pressed for time and want to feel that they are being provided with tools and skills to improve their relationship on a weekly basis. My entire practice, whether working with individuals or couples in therapy is focused on using research based and targeted treatments, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).

In my work with couples in counseling, I bring in elements of the Gottman Method, Relational Life Therapy, and Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) in a way that is specific to the couple. No two couples are the same and every couple deserves individualized treatment.

If my approach sounds like a good fit you and your partner, give me a call so we can explore working together.

Contact Phil here.

Tips for Achieving Your New Year’s Resolutions

New Year’s resolutions are often made with the best intentions, but with little to no attention to the factors that will lead to the greatest success (i.e. change a behavior, start going to therapy, be more healthy, etc.). In fact, the statistics about people actually keeping their resolutions are not very good. However, there is hope! By following a few techniques you can greatly increase the success of your New Year’s resolutions.

Be Realistic: Setting a goal that is too massive will surely fail. For example, many people set New Year’s resolutions that they are going to change their career, or “become healthy”, or stop fighting with their partner for family. The problem with creating resolutions in this way is that they can feel overwhelming. What does it mean to “become healthy”? A full over haul of your lifestyle is tough. Start with something more manageable, “I am going to walk more, make more of an effort to stay connected with people I care about, and explore finding a healthy outlet for stress.”

Set Objectives: Be very clear about how you will measure your progress, while allowing for some wiggle room. Remember, you are a human, not a robot. Decide what a reasonable amount of success towards your New Year’s resolution is. Then write down the steps you need to take to achieve your goal. An important rule of thumb: if you break down a project or resolution into steps and still have trouble getting started, then the first step is still too big.

Use Positive Visualization: People often tend to think of the dread of starting a project or goal, “I hate the gym.” or “I’ll never be more organized, my place is a mess!” Instead of being confronted with these negative thoughts, think about the how you will feel and how your life will be different if you meet your goal, “If I make it to the gym today I will sleep better, feel better, and get out of the house.”

Don’t Let Setbacks Stop You: There are always going to be hiccups and hassles that can impede your progress from day to day. It is totally normal for this to happen. However, when it does, get out a piece of paper and write down one small thing you can do to get started again working towards your New Year’s Resolution. The old adage of “The hardest part is getting started.” can be very true. Get started and don’t give up when you miss a step towards your goal.

I often get many calls from people this time of year wanting to start therapy or find ways to be more successful in their career or personal life.  I work with all of my client’s to identify manageable goals, capitalize on their strengths and make the most of their life and relationships, through the use of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Positive Psychology, and other goal oriented techniques.

I welcome your calls and emails and hope to help you reach your full potential in 2013.

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Phil Boissiere, MFT provides goal oriented Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in San Francisco and Menlo Park.

Positive Psychology for Success

All to often people shy away from seeking therapy due to misconceptions about what therapy is. This is in large part due to psychodynamic (Freudian etc.) approaches that do a fair amount of “digging” around in peoples childhood experiences. Unfortunately, this leads to people not receiving the support they need, which in turn increases or leads to dysfunction and dissatisfaction with life. Fortunately, modern approaches to psychotherapy and counseling, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, focus on helping people reach their goals and capitalize on their strengths.

In recent years the field of Positive Psychology has come to fruition and has been shown to have a profound effect on furthering an individuals occupational, social, academic, creative, and intellectual goals. Positive psychology is a rich empirical basis for health, work, quality of life, and leadership coaching. 

So, what is Positive Psychology exactly? Very simply put, it is the exploration of processes and circumstances that lead to optimal performance, life satisfaction, and health.

Unlike psychological theories from the past, which tend to focus on “what is wrong”, Positive Psychology focuses on human strengths and healthy positive experiences to improve the lives of people.

I utilize the principals and applications of Positive Psychology to help business professionals, artists, authors, and tech leaders advance their careers, personal growth, and success. I have had great success combining Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Positive Psychology with coaching in San Francisco, Palo Alto, Menlo Park, and the greater Silicon Valley. A common statement from my clients is “I didn’t know therapy could be this way!” or “This is so empowering.”

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Anxiety

Research shows that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is usually the most effective option for the treatment of anxiety and related disorders. This is because CBT addresses the patterns of thoughts that lead to anxious feelings and subsequent behaviors. CBT can help you discover the underlying causes of your worry and fear, develop relaxation strategies and look at situations in a new, less anxiety provoking way. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy gives you the tools to overcome anxiety that you can use for a lifetime.

There are a number of different anxiety disorders and each person is unique, so therapy should be tailored to your specific symptoms and concerns. For example, during the treatment of obsessive-compulsive disorder, treatment will be different than the treatment for panic attacks. The length of therapy will also depend on the type and severity of your anxiety disorder. Fortunately, CBT for anxiety is usually short-term and focused. According to the American Psychological Association, many people improve significantly within 8 to 10 sessions when working with a professional that treats anxiety and related conditions.

There are many different types of therapy used to treat anxiety, but the leading approach is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Some individuals choose to explore a combination of therapy and medication management. However, this is a personal decision and is addressed on a case-by-case basis.

In San Francisco and the Silicon Valley (Menlo Park, Palo Alto, San Jose etc.) there are many mental health professionals. It is important that you find a specialist in the treatment of anxiety that utilizes Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and can connect you with additional resources, such as a medical doctor, if needed.

During your first visits, your therapist or other mental health professional should be assessing for the presence of other disorders that may be contributing or exacerbating your anxiety, such as ADHD. Anxiety, depression, and adult ADHD,  can severely impact an individuals work performance and relationships.